I realize I haven't written anything here in awhile. I also own the fact that I pretty much went bat shit crazy after my momma died. That being said I have posted a few things about my dad and his prostrate cancer and how strong his battle has been with it. Long story short. A couple of years ago right in the middle of dad being dad so to speak AKA pretty much the strongest person I have ever known--his leg suddenly started swelling. His kaiser docs took xrays ultrasounds etc etc and ended up telling him it must have been arthritis. And at this point his leg looked like a friggin balloon. He was told that there was no blood clot. then later on after he fell and broke his hip because of his inability to be mobile there was some speculation about a blood clot and more meds were added to his daily regimen.
His kaiser cancer doctor kept prescribing more pain meds and he got on morphine which of course limited his cognitive thinking skills as far as wanting to get up and do something about the situation.
I can't begin to imagine what he actually has dealt with throughout the entire process. Finally his foot from the swollen leg got extremely infected. He ended up in the hospital where they did an aggressive treatment to remove the infection from his leg. And it ended up with kidney failure. Long story short. Kaiser sent him home to die. They placed him on hospice and even though ever since the infection has been removed from his leg he was actually in better health than he has been in for the past couple of years but because they couldn't give him the cancer meds at the same time as the radical treatment to remove the infection. This is is story now. And why he was sent home to die. After a couple of months of no coumadin and no medicine from kaiser whatsoever funny thing is that his leg has not shown any type of swelling at all. He's lying in bed basically immobile but his leg seems to have been cured. And I guess that is the thing that really pisses me off. His lack of quality living for the past couple of years has been greatly affected because of poor care. IMO. And now. Hospice is in charge. They act like they are here to help. Nope. They are here to help a person die and the quicker the better. That's pretty much what they are here for. Assisted suicide. Perhaps others have dealt with more educated people who work for hospice or those who are familiar with assisted dying. My experience so far has been that people calling themselves "helpful" have talked right in front of my dad talking about things like "He's not able to hold food down and nauseated and is at the end"
I get that reality is paramount but my feelings are that what hospice has shown me in my dealings with them so far is that they don't care if the person is cognitive. God is the one who will decide when things are over. That's all I know. And I think that hospice should rethink their message. Hope and the fact that the person is still fighting to be here and doesn't want to lay down and die is what ya'll at hospice care should be thinking about. Stop making it all about dying. Every now and then life is actually about living and making the best about what you have left. That's not Dying. That's living. Get it straight hospice. FFS I don't care how much money you are being subsidized with from these insurance companies. Stop thinking your mission is about assisted dying. Assisting living should be your main goal. #cancersucks #hospicesucks #kaiserhealthcare
